3rd Annual ‘Pie in the Face’ or ‘Pat on the Back’ Awards

by: Larry Davies | Mar 5, 2010

I seldom venture into politics but once a year I just can’t resist poking a fun at people who stand out for whatever reason as particularly deserving of either a pie in the face or a pat on the back. At the same time I use it as a way of encouraging you and I to take a long look at ourselves. Obviously, I do not publicly endorse any particular politics or person.

It all started when I wrote about a company that for a modest fee would visit anyone you choose and cream him/her with a pie. What a great idea! Think of the possibilities!

  • Do insensitive jerks walk all over you? Let them have a fresh piece of your… pie!
  • Has your boss been a pain lately? Apply some first aid and enjoy the last laugh!
  • Do you know a preacher who’s been a little stiff in the collar? (Forget I said that!)

Does this sound like fun to you? I thought so and wrote a story about some folks who definitely needed a pie in the eye. What happened next surprised even me.

I received an email complimenting the pie-in-the-face article. But then the writer asked: “I love being hit with pies. Don’t you? Would you like to see some pictures?” (No! I wouldn’t!) More letters came with the same type of message. For months, I was bombarded with weird photos of folks creamed from every angle and loving every minute of it. Does that sound strange to you?

“What is wrong with you folks? Get a life and leave me alone! Don’t you know the difference between satire and cheap thrills? You’re sick, sick, sick! Stop sending those pictures! This year I throw my first pie at “Creamed Pie Whackos!” I know, I know. It’s what they want. I can’t win!”

Now, who else could benefit from a little “humble” pie? After all, this is the season of Lent. Confession and repentance is good for the soul. Right? So here is my third (maybe last?) annual pie in the face award for those notable individuals who refuse to repent of their arrogance and display a grave need for a “whip-cream-filled” dose of humility. But, this year to appease my sense of fairness and my innate desire to be positive, I am also giving a pat on the back of recognition to individuals who accomplish great feats yet display a Christ-like humility.

Enough of introductions… let’s get started. Who gets the next pie?

Pie Splat! Enough is enough! Would someone please tell the media that Bill Clinton is no longer president? Shades of Monica-gate… Now it’s unethical pardons, missing furniture, last minute deals, and hidden money transactions: It’s enough to make you gag! Please Bill, no more.

Pat on the Back! Our always- professional, former Vice President Gore has behaved quite honorably after all the confusion and questions surrounding the recent election. He is quickly finding his role as teacher and statesman. Newspaper articles report him as content and adjusting to his new lifestyle. Who knows? If he ran again, I might even vote for him. Congratulations!
Pie Splat! Robert Noel and Marjorie Knoller were known to spoil their two Presa Camario mastiff dogs with special food and walks along the beach. Unfortunately there was not as much attention or remorse expressed over the cruel death of Diane Whipple mauled by one of those same dogs.
Pat on the Back! Father Fortunato Di Noto who spent more than four years tracking down Child Pornography sites on the internet and proved to be a key factor in breaking an international ring of pedophiles. Asked why, he simply remarked: “Silence is what allows pedophiles to win.”

Pie Splat! For the times you had a golden opportunity to witness your faith and lacked courage.

Pat on the Back! For when you had the same opportunity and found the courage to reach out.

Maybe this is where Proverbs speaks with such authority:

  • Pride leads to disgrace, but with humility comes wisdom. Good people are guided by their honesty; treacherous people are destroyed by their dishonesty. (Proverbs 11:2-3)
  • Pride ends in humiliation, while humility brings honor. (Proverbs 29:23)

Admittedly, we all could use a “creamed pie” occasionally to smash our pride. As Easter looms, remember how much God loves you and wants to enjoy an honest, intimate relationship with you, warts and all. Act now! Don’t wait for a “pie in the eye” to be your wake-up call!


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