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“Readers Respond to 'Church: There Is No Place for Me Here'" Part 3

“I am a strong Christian. I love the Lord. I love His word. However, I don't go to church. I think churches have missed the boat. Church is about fellowship and giving encouragement and strength to fellow believers. Instead, we sit next to a perfect stranger for an hour and ‘worship.’ We stay isolated and alone… only now we are alone within a crowd.” Alicia

Last week, hundreds of you responded to an anonymous email writer who said: “I haven't served a church for years. So why do I read the Bible you sent or try to learn about God and watch religious shows? I even saw Billy Graham and regularly listen to a Christian radio station. Why do I do all that but avoid going to church?” This touched many. Here are a few of your responses.

“I relate to the writer of the e-mail so much I could have written it myself.  Reading through it, I'd think: ‘Exactly! That's just how it is! I agree! I feel that way too!’  As you can tell, I'm single (not divorced, not widowed, not a parent...just single). I can't tell you how refreshing it was to read something from a pastor that finally addresses this issue. Believe me, it's a BIG issue.  I don't go to church for many of the same reasons your writer addressed.”

“This message really touched me. I am not sure I would be involved or attending church if I did not have kids. It is hard to be thrown into a family environment when you are single. It helped that I had friends who helped me.” Jodi

 

 

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“I find it difficult to go into a place not knowing many folks but sometimes you have to take that step and check out the possibilities. A wise woman told me, if you have an opportunity to go out then go. If you don’t enjoy yourself, then at least you've gotten out even if for a short while. When the next opportunity presents itself: go out and do it all over again. Each time, it gets easier.”

“Yesterday I was thinking and hurting over how many couples are in my church. It makes one feel like not even attending. Sometimes I think I shouldn't feel sorry for myself but it's the worst feeling in the world, being lonely and feeling like it doesn't matter if you exist or not.” Whitney

“I feel it is very important to establish your own identity and work toward a common goal with your church, which is to have a closer relationship with God. I think the least we can do as "singles" is force ourselves into a situation that may seem uncomfortable at first. You'll be surprised to see that it may not be uncomfortable whatsoever!” Lora

“I joined a church 4 years ago because of our children. I was an alcoholic for 18 years and got sober in AA. My excuse for not attending church was because of those "hypocrites" but I was the biggest hypocrite. God wants a relationship with all of us.” Warren

“I am a Registered Nurse and work weekends and nights. Church should not be about me fitting into a Church's schedule. The "Church" needs to serve the community. I think we could take lessons from organizations such as Alcoholics Anonymous which has meetings all the time. I need a supportive community of believers as much as others need support for addiction.” Joanne

“For two years, we were more like visitors at church because we were often away taking care of my parents. Now when we go, I feel very isolated. What is it about church that makes us feel that way?  It should be a warm inviting place for all members of the family of God.” Susan

“My husband recently started coming to worship service with me but before that I felt so alone. I once thought about reserving a couple of rows for pew pals: A place for those who come alone. Then they can have people to sit with each week.”

“I was single so long and remember well the loneliness and feeling uncomfortable. A singles group with good leaders helped a lot. Teachers who would talk about anything and everything, events that were not "date-oriented", preaching that dealt with how to live as singles -- all helped me. Getting active in helping others helped me get my mind off my singleness.” Lisa

Next: Click Here for Answers -- "Church: There Is No Place For Me Here!"

 

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Last modified May 22, 2006.

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