Weekly Devotions - Sowing Seeds of Faith

Article about Sowing Seeds of Faith and Internet Ministry

Would you like to become a Sowing Seeds Ministry partner? Click here for more information.

“Church: There Is No Place for Me Here" Part 2

I fully intended to write an article talking about how our church can improve but the following series of emails gives such a raw picture of what someone on the outside the church looking in thinks. I felt compelled to share this with you and hope to give you more answers soon.

Dear Larry: All churches should make people feel there is a place for them. For example, there are millions of people who are single: not divorced, not widowed… just single. Churches lump those groups together. Other churches have singles groups but people who have gone to their stuff say you might as well go to a bar. It's like a meat market. They don't get anything out of it. The divorced whine while others cry. So the message for us: 'There is no place for you here.'

Last time I gave you ten reasons why I love my church: brag, brag, brag! It can be a little sickening so this time I wanted to write about how we can improve. I solicited input from our staff and from several of our small groups. Everyone shared great ideas but then I received the email you just read. The writer will remain anonymous but I know him through our prayer network. He is young and single and recently expressed interest in God but claims no church affiliation. Over the next few days through email, he shared his frustrations and revealed valuable insight for us all.

Look for Larry's Latest book coming March 25, 2007.

"Live the Light!

Five Weeks to a Life that Shines!"

Click Here

"In my whole life, I never heard a pastor with the guts to talk to single people about stuff they really face: like loneliness, sex and having to solve every problem on our own. What we actually hear is how your money is all yours and you have free time. We never hear about how there is only one income and most of us aren't lawyers or doctors and barely make ends meet. And we would give up our free time in a second not to feel so lonely. But the church just wants you to volunteer for things like watching the kids in the nursery so parents can get spiritual lessons."

He also sent me an article written by Julia Duin: Why Singles Boycott Churches. She wrote: "Single Adult Ministries Journal reports that the largest group of nonchurched people are singles… Church attendance is undeniably shrinking while the number of singles in America is skyrocketing. More and more Christian singles are quietly boycotting their churches."

My email friend was blunt: "Every church talks about family but never about singles. So if you go to hell for not going to church, millions of singles will be there. But don't listen to me. I don't even go to church and probably never will. Church is for families like everything in this stupid world."

Julia Duin adds her own list of discontented singles: "A female government worker friend of mine in Northern Virginia; an evangelical male journalist in Seattle; another Christian male journalist in Wyoming; a male acquaintance in Richmond; a female journalist in Oregon - all of these are real singles who have put up and put out and have now opted out of an irrelevant church."

The Email writer continued: "I have an idea. I haven't served a church for years. So why do I read the Bible you sent or try to learn about God and watch religious shows? I even saw Billy Graham and regularly listen to a Christian radio station. Why do I do all that but avoid going to church?"

Why indeed. Churches like ours can brag about vision and Bible studies, programs and missions but if a large portion of our population opts out, something is terribly wrong so maybe we need to stop preaching and listen to those who opt out. Jesus told his disciples in Matthew, “I have been given complete authority in heaven and on earth. Therefore, go and make disciples of all the nations, baptizing them in the name of the Father and the Son and the Holy Spirit. Teach these new disciples to obey all the commands I have given you. And be sure of this: I am with you always, even to the end of the age.” (28:18-20) Maybe the question is: How do we obey Jesus?

The Email writer continues: "For one thing, it's hard to go into an environment you are not familiar with by yourself. I feel that I would stick out like a sore thumb. Maybe people would say 'Hi.' but then would go off and sit by whomever. I'd probably have an anxiety attack. I would never go to "Nurture Night" at your church, not that it's bad but I would wonder who would sit by me and who I would talk to. Would I feel all alone, head out the door and no one even notice I'm gone?”

“All those fears keep me away. Right now, I don't care about singles groups. I know enough singles. I want to learn about God. I want support. You said people in church can be your family. That's what I want. Social events are fine but not what I need. I have events. I need the church."

Next: Your response to "Church: There Is No Place for Me Here!" Click Here:

Do you want to join us in prayer for others? Do you need prayer? Click Here.

Last modified May 22, 2006.

Would you like to receive your own weekly devotions? Be involved in our prayer chain?

New Web Feature: Read our devotions daily... Click here